Thursday, April 1, 2010

Figuring Shit Out

What am I doing here? I woke up this morning in a sweat, the heavy realization of what I've done over the past few months pressing down on my chest like a ton of rocks. Did I seriously move with my cats cross country? To say this move was impulsive is an understatement. Yes, I was partly running away and I was partly running towards, but what from? What to? Was this actually the best career choice? I'm honestly not sure. What I am sure of is that I need to make my own luck. The likelihood of me being one in a million people that are "discovered" isn't entirely realistic. I need to be writing and producing my own things. I need to make this happen, because no one else is going to.

I just don't feel very creative here. Maybe it's the sunshine, maybe it's how everyone looks the same, maybe it's the lack of grit and the abundance of glitter, but I need to somehow get my creative juices flowing. I need to figure out what I want in life and which path is the best one to travel. I need to start the next phase of my life.

So I'm going to go climb a mountain now and hope the (semi)fresh air will give me some answers.

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