Thank you Tom

Well I had an interesting audition today. After dashing through the rain and hailing a cab (a cab that totally screwed me over by going three blocks out of the way, btw) I walked into the theatre and put the charm on. But it was . . . hmmm. . . out of the ordinary. A play that is doubling as a haunted house. A psychological haunted house, mind you. I am really struggling for words right now because the scenes that they described to me were so disgusting, disturbing and soooo inappropriate that I can’t bring myself to type out the words. Let’s suffice it to say that one of the scenes involves blood . . . coming out of a woman’s ahem and a nurse then throwing up said blood. Think about it.

Is that enough to deter me? Ummm, no not really. It sounds cool to have a haunted house that actually might scare you, instead of those cheesy ones with zombies that we’ve all been to. The reason for my hesitation has mostly to do money. I really hate saying that because I don’t want to sound shallow but, they are only willing to pay $200 for an entire month of rehearsals and 17 four hour-long performances. That comes out to $2.90 per hour for the performances with no pay for rehearsals . . . am I off base for thinking that’s utterly lame? Don’t get me wrong- I have performed in countless plays for free. But . . . I was passionate about them. I guess that’s my answer then.


As my friend LL said to me over a beer the other night, “I feel like I’m in the wrong body, at the wrong time, with the wrong dream.” When I sighed in agreement she pressed on, “Seriously. When I moved to New York, Broadway went dark.” That’s a pretty powerful statement. People have said that you have to be insane to be an actor. That is true now more than ever. With the downfall of the economy, came less and less work in film, TV, and theatre jobs. And yet there are some of us who keep pressing on. People for whom acting is such an ingrained part of us that we have no choice but to keep trying.

I don’t know. Maybe I should do the haunted house. After all, Broadway is practically dark.


Addendum: I was just talking to the BF about the haunted house situation and he brought up an interesting interview with Tom Cruise. I googled said interview, and my good friend Tom made an interesting point, “If this is the only chance I ever get at this, I want to make sure I enjoy every second of it.” Why thank you Tom. If I’m already thinking about something with a tinge of dread then I probably shouldn’t do it. Instead, I should focus my energy on productions that I’m actually excited about. I haven’t read or watched The Secret yet but I think this is what Oprah was getting at when she told me to focus on what I want and to put that energy out there. Thank you Oprah and Tom. It’s been enlightening.