Where are all the Auditions?

I just realized that it’s already Wednesday and I haven’t been on a single audition this week, nor do I have any scheduled for the rest of the week. What is going on? Where is all the work? Oh, that’s right. We’re in a recession. And SAG still hasn’t officially renewed our contract which expired in June. Oh, and the damn Vice President or our country told people to avoid the SUBWAYS so people are scared to death of the so called swine flu and staying at home. Come on guys, get over it. It’s the freakin flu. Yes, I know it’s dangerous in Mexico and all but the strain here has mutated and is less potent. You will not die. You will be sick for a week and then go about your normal life knowing that you are one of the lucky few that will probably be immune the next time it comes around. So take off your face masks, ride the subway, and write me something to star in!

Haven’t you heard that I go bizerk when I haven’t acted in a few days! I don’t even care if you cast me. I just want to pretend for 2 minutes that I’m a valium ridden housewife with a gay husband or that I’m a young 20 something talking about getting high at a job interview. This is the stuff that I live off of! Please, just give me a moment to act like a complete psycho and then pat me on the back and tell me how great of a psycho I am so I feel validated in life. PLEASE.

No, I will not take my top off for you in the audition room so don't ask.